if insomnia is a mean of having difficulty to sleep then what would one calls for having dreams that seem as real and having the ability to think in deep sleep? is it still considered as a nightmare or a disease of which i haven't came across with before.. definitely not a new one but the kind of a rare occurrence? it not that 'rare' anymore if kinda experienced this almost every night, no?
it felt almost like a deja-vu dreaming of things which occurred and will occur, from time to time. as if i have experienced some in real life but vastly forgotten, yet the feeling was really there. made me pondering much after waking up in the middle of my sleep, thinking if i am still in any sort of dream or breathing a real life.
the scary thing about this is that i always come across with the people i knew in my present time and some of the past, interacting with them in my dreams as usual. As if i am living in two different worlds with the same people around just sometimes being a little different in their characteristics of which i kinda like more than the real thing. hah!
should they become my reality, they will still be like a dream. though, it strange and bizarre but it's surreal even to ignore.
Monday, May 10, 2010
just a stupid remark
ohh...and one more thing, i was having my dinner last night, when this Mentor thing was on in the t.v. and all the contestants were giving wishes for their mothers due to 'Mother's day. some were on their tears like waterfall and giving out a lot of emotions...
beh... quit lah with the acting. everyday is a mother's day and not just yesterday, what! come on la. as if the love for the mothers only last for yesterday.
beh... quit lah with the acting. everyday is a mother's day and not just yesterday, what! come on la. as if the love for the mothers only last for yesterday.
Sunday, May 9, 2010
critical mind
yeah, i know, it's monday. nothing much to do but wasting time surfing the net. am waiting for the current ordered stock to arrive and wallaaa....it's gonna be busy, for a while. brain ain't doin' much function, getting dumb by the seconds so i blog to keep it on track, not much but at least am thinking something and hopefully the brain won't get too rusted to think of something to write. here goes.
was invited to join on a trip to Clark, somewhere in the Philippines. it's a boys trip so you know where it might end up. im not interested into the main purpose of the trip but more into the culture, the way people live their lives and all. faces belong in the streets.
was thinking to go but the date was over booked by other BOYS so we are forced to change it to august instead of October. i'm cancelling my seat due to trips clash with my mom's. she's going on a trip to Johor-Singapore with her 'traveling group' consisting of my aunties and co. need to give her the money. i'm a good son :P so sorry guys, just go on without me. not that it matters much but enjoy the trip.. just don't bring back diseases huhu.
that reminds me when i was in Indonesia a few yrs back. so many things happened. people were like ants living in one place with so many people doing whatever they can just to survive, that's harsh life, and the rich just sit around and watch, some were picking up LV begs costing up to millions of millions of Rupies... even billions worth of hand begs in Wisma Jakarta, while others bathing on daily basis at the sewers. if it's not a wake up call then i don't know what's that supposed to mean.
imagine, with the numbers of people we are having here in Sabah and all the jobs provided..how many of us are making money at the end of the month? not much eh. where are all the money go? to the neighboring countries? is it not, when most of the working people are those who trespassed the border lines? speaking of trespassers, seeing on how many immigrants staying here currently, legal or not, we can have a lil' Manila or lil' Jakarta here and there, almost in every district.. why need to travel abroad just to experience the joy?
scary, is it not? to know that they are over populating us locals and the most thing we could do is blaming the higher ups for being a complete ass for not taking any action or whatever mean to counter the matter. i recalled back the song Imagine by the great John Lennon, how many of us really could accept the fact that we need to live side by side with other people regardless of their nationalities, religions, believes, races, skin colours and all? *sarcasm*
Questions. what do you see me in your eyes? what do we see others in our eyes?
was invited to join on a trip to Clark, somewhere in the Philippines. it's a boys trip so you know where it might end up. im not interested into the main purpose of the trip but more into the culture, the way people live their lives and all. faces belong in the streets.
was thinking to go but the date was over booked by other BOYS so we are forced to change it to august instead of October. i'm cancelling my seat due to trips clash with my mom's. she's going on a trip to Johor-Singapore with her 'traveling group' consisting of my aunties and co. need to give her the money. i'm a good son :P so sorry guys, just go on without me. not that it matters much but enjoy the trip.. just don't bring back diseases huhu.
that reminds me when i was in Indonesia a few yrs back. so many things happened. people were like ants living in one place with so many people doing whatever they can just to survive, that's harsh life, and the rich just sit around and watch, some were picking up LV begs costing up to millions of millions of Rupies... even billions worth of hand begs in Wisma Jakarta, while others bathing on daily basis at the sewers. if it's not a wake up call then i don't know what's that supposed to mean.
imagine, with the numbers of people we are having here in Sabah and all the jobs provided..how many of us are making money at the end of the month? not much eh. where are all the money go? to the neighboring countries? is it not, when most of the working people are those who trespassed the border lines? speaking of trespassers, seeing on how many immigrants staying here currently, legal or not, we can have a lil' Manila or lil' Jakarta here and there, almost in every district.. why need to travel abroad just to experience the joy?
scary, is it not? to know that they are over populating us locals and the most thing we could do is blaming the higher ups for being a complete ass for not taking any action or whatever mean to counter the matter. i recalled back the song Imagine by the great John Lennon, how many of us really could accept the fact that we need to live side by side with other people regardless of their nationalities, religions, believes, races, skin colours and all? *sarcasm*
Questions. what do you see me in your eyes? what do we see others in our eyes?
Saturday, May 8, 2010
sunday rambling
before anything, i'd like to wish all the moms, the moms's moms' and the mom's mom's mom's that i've ever encountered before, wishing you all 'happy mother's day'. keep that good work of shaping your daughters to the very best of the best, i'd be happy to marry one, one day. aha!!
blasting off classic Santana, with all the drums, guitars n piano mixed together in one piece.. what a lovely Sunday, it's a seasonal paradise but who'd cares. a paradise is a paradise, though, the warmth is kinda biting hard like a mofo but what else can one expects on a 'Sun-day', eh?
so i went outside the house enjoying the warm windy atmosphere, though, cloudy but the brightness really hurts. i have my fair share of problem with my vision. it's all good but too bad, some people just don't have the similarity of wavelength and thoughts to have it easy on a Sunday, accelerating their vehicles causing sound pollution by that boom boom klang katung ekzos pipe breaking codes of my patience limitation. come on la weh, no more stress on Sunday.
speaking of stress, it kills. really. not showing any symptom at first but in the end causing so many diseases such as high blood pressure, stroke, heart attack, mental disorder, and the list goes on. even without giving away symptoms, it could easily delivers us to the next world with just a snap, mind you. one of the best silent killers, if not the best.
i met a lady last night. she was sitting to someone i knew during the talk, so my guess was that she's the sister of that other lady. my aunt got into a conversation with the her at the end of the talk session and it shocked me to the core when she addressed herself to be the mother of that my customer (the other lady). i hope my eyes didn't deceive me because she really really really do look young maybe in her 30s or 40s at top but since her daughter had been married for years and have been given birth to ... like 4 children or so, my guess she's already hits 60 years old.
i couldn't believe my eyes, seriously. i always heard stories of old people look pretty young at old age but i never saw one before and last night was really an eye opener, to the max. she even look younger that her daughter and not just me, other people were kinda shocked too. she told us that she's a practitioner .. of what kind? i don't know. my guess goes to 'some teaching' of which i don't want to belong to. heh. i rather grow old and aged like everyone else, never indent to defy the curse of aging, not at all.
been switching places to keep up with the warmth and somehow, i ended up in the dining table and it's like heaven here with the cool sensation. it's a new found joy!!! haha.
at around 11, my friend and i hit the streets, again. he wanted to spend some money on a bottle of vodka, sort of. i wasn't into drinking last night but more of an accompany. so i drove him around town to catch a good nest to flock on. we ended up at Hito, listening to good songs by 'Lester n chixs group'. sorry , i don't know the actual name but they are good singers..or, like my friend Sandra always says, they are good SONGERS since they sang other people's songs. watched basketball and baseball matches on ESPN, we talked much how the games were tactically played, which interests me a bit. i like tactical games. it's like playing command and conquer in a real life version excluding the guns and bullets but balls.
we had a couple of beers and the Japanese meat balls with Thai sauce. also a good accompany by the manager, he's quite friendly, having good talks and laughs together with us. my friend and i, were the last 2 customers to walk out Hito, even leaving 2 bottles of Tiger beer for today's football match. the truth is, i'm already tired with all these drinking outings. sigh.
we hit Lido at around 3 last night completing my to-do-list of wanting to eat fried egg. i have 1 weird habit, a bad one if it fits to. even if i don't want to eat, i need to touch the skin of the egg, every night because if i don't, i won't fall asleep. weird. believe it .. or not.
just another weird rambling.
blasting off classic Santana, with all the drums, guitars n piano mixed together in one piece.. what a lovely Sunday, it's a seasonal paradise but who'd cares. a paradise is a paradise, though, the warmth is kinda biting hard like a mofo but what else can one expects on a 'Sun-day', eh?
so i went outside the house enjoying the warm windy atmosphere, though, cloudy but the brightness really hurts. i have my fair share of problem with my vision. it's all good but too bad, some people just don't have the similarity of wavelength and thoughts to have it easy on a Sunday, accelerating their vehicles causing sound pollution by that boom boom klang katung ekzos pipe breaking codes of my patience limitation. come on la weh, no more stress on Sunday.
speaking of stress, it kills. really. not showing any symptom at first but in the end causing so many diseases such as high blood pressure, stroke, heart attack, mental disorder, and the list goes on. even without giving away symptoms, it could easily delivers us to the next world with just a snap, mind you. one of the best silent killers, if not the best.
i met a lady last night. she was sitting to someone i knew during the talk, so my guess was that she's the sister of that other lady. my aunt got into a conversation with the her at the end of the talk session and it shocked me to the core when she addressed herself to be the mother of that my customer (the other lady). i hope my eyes didn't deceive me because she really really really do look young maybe in her 30s or 40s at top but since her daughter had been married for years and have been given birth to ... like 4 children or so, my guess she's already hits 60 years old.
i couldn't believe my eyes, seriously. i always heard stories of old people look pretty young at old age but i never saw one before and last night was really an eye opener, to the max. she even look younger that her daughter and not just me, other people were kinda shocked too. she told us that she's a practitioner .. of what kind? i don't know. my guess goes to 'some teaching' of which i don't want to belong to. heh. i rather grow old and aged like everyone else, never indent to defy the curse of aging, not at all.
been switching places to keep up with the warmth and somehow, i ended up in the dining table and it's like heaven here with the cool sensation. it's a new found joy!!! haha.
at around 11, my friend and i hit the streets, again. he wanted to spend some money on a bottle of vodka, sort of. i wasn't into drinking last night but more of an accompany. so i drove him around town to catch a good nest to flock on. we ended up at Hito, listening to good songs by 'Lester n chixs group'. sorry , i don't know the actual name but they are good singers..or, like my friend Sandra always says, they are good SONGERS since they sang other people's songs. watched basketball and baseball matches on ESPN, we talked much how the games were tactically played, which interests me a bit. i like tactical games. it's like playing command and conquer in a real life version excluding the guns and bullets but balls.
we had a couple of beers and the Japanese meat balls with Thai sauce. also a good accompany by the manager, he's quite friendly, having good talks and laughs together with us. my friend and i, were the last 2 customers to walk out Hito, even leaving 2 bottles of Tiger beer for today's football match. the truth is, i'm already tired with all these drinking outings. sigh.
we hit Lido at around 3 last night completing my to-do-list of wanting to eat fried egg. i have 1 weird habit, a bad one if it fits to. even if i don't want to eat, i need to touch the skin of the egg, every night because if i don't, i won't fall asleep. weird. believe it .. or not.
just another weird rambling.
Wednesday, May 5, 2010
something something..
...and so i am bored.
i went to a convenient store the other day to get my mom the things she wanted to bring on her vacation, well, not practically me buying the stuff but more like standing here and there, and bodyguard-ing her just like any other shopping days. im not the type who goes around surveying items.. i usually get my self a place to sit and wait, and so i did that, again that day.
i saw two dudes standing and staring at the corner like 15 minutes or so, spacing out like stone statues while i was 'bodyguarding' my mom and it really caught my curiosity. so i went there and joined them. off all things i had in mind, they never came across to the actual answer to what was going on.
they stood there stagnantly while comparing prices of each soap, battling with so many brands and numbers of soaps. i was like .. gila. so i went and got me a bench and continued spying them for afar.
it's kinda bit crazy to do such thing but then when i think about it a little...damn, i can't remember when was the first time i bought a soap off my own hard earning money but things getting pretty much expensive, these days. some are really really, extremely expensive. really a harsh time to be living in, eh.
really an old fashion move. more or less, it's a must.
a lot of things are considered a necessity nowadays and they really drag people to spend more money and some, end up in a so called 'self poverty'. Addiction to daily doses of internet, phone calls, SMSes, MMSes, etc. this, little by little, leaching out so much money from our pockets, unnoticed. while some people gaining a lot of money from their business providing this new-found-joy, most people stare prices to keep surviving.
i went to a convenient store the other day to get my mom the things she wanted to bring on her vacation, well, not practically me buying the stuff but more like standing here and there, and bodyguard-ing her just like any other shopping days. im not the type who goes around surveying items.. i usually get my self a place to sit and wait, and so i did that, again that day.
i saw two dudes standing and staring at the corner like 15 minutes or so, spacing out like stone statues while i was 'bodyguarding' my mom and it really caught my curiosity. so i went there and joined them. off all things i had in mind, they never came across to the actual answer to what was going on.
they stood there stagnantly while comparing prices of each soap, battling with so many brands and numbers of soaps. i was like .. gila. so i went and got me a bench and continued spying them for afar.
it's kinda bit crazy to do such thing but then when i think about it a little...damn, i can't remember when was the first time i bought a soap off my own hard earning money but things getting pretty much expensive, these days. some are really really, extremely expensive. really a harsh time to be living in, eh.
really an old fashion move. more or less, it's a must.
a lot of things are considered a necessity nowadays and they really drag people to spend more money and some, end up in a so called 'self poverty'. Addiction to daily doses of internet, phone calls, SMSes, MMSes, etc. this, little by little, leaching out so much money from our pockets, unnoticed. while some people gaining a lot of money from their business providing this new-found-joy, most people stare prices to keep surviving.
Thursday, April 29, 2010
school bus driver
so i was driving to lintas from luyang and took short cuts along the way. i managed to skip traffic jams and when i was just about to get to the main road from a busy t-junction, there was a school bus, suddenly skip through the heavy line of cars intercepting everyone. mind you, she drove like there were no cars coming from ahead. i was like.... woaaa gila ni driver. laju lagi tu.
yeah, of course, everyone was chasing time but come on la, have a bit concern for the children. gila. devils playing with other people's lives, those kids who knows nothing about road accidents and seat belts, as IF there are seat belts provided in a typical school bus. it makes me a bit angry and ruin a portion of my day, seriously.
it hits the back of my head and shivers a goose bump. down in memory line, there was once a maniac school bus driver in my hometown who drives a kamikaze-like just to catch time. a delinquent amongst school bus drivers, he was. it's fated i guess that one day to fail to hit the brakes on time and banged a couple of school children. sad, how the world turns.
...and i thought i was about to see another sad incident happening in my present. duh.
yeah, of course, everyone was chasing time but come on la, have a bit concern for the children. gila. devils playing with other people's lives, those kids who knows nothing about road accidents and seat belts, as IF there are seat belts provided in a typical school bus. it makes me a bit angry and ruin a portion of my day, seriously.
it hits the back of my head and shivers a goose bump. down in memory line, there was once a maniac school bus driver in my hometown who drives a kamikaze-like just to catch time. a delinquent amongst school bus drivers, he was. it's fated i guess that one day to fail to hit the brakes on time and banged a couple of school children. sad, how the world turns.
...and i thought i was about to see another sad incident happening in my present. duh.
Sunday, April 25, 2010
rambling
it's 3.18 in the morning and im still awake and alive. im feeling sleepy alright but dreamland wont accept my present, just yet. i've been trying to get access since midnight but the brain wont stop to work out hard, projecting thoughts, thoughts of which we usually dub as happiness. i wish things are just simple and cool but i am no wise man for a trend setter. people already have their own guidelines... and it's pretty hard to follow, indeed.
it's good to experience to good life sometimes. i bought myself a watch today. i've been wanting to buy one recently, i lost the last one by gaining some fats here and there. yup, getting blotted by the days, i say. it feels nice though, well yeah, i cant afford to pamper myself with cool stuff every now and then. i ain't no rich guy from the block but miracles do happen, eh? i guess HE always pick up dates and channeling em miracles during harsh days just to make it in time for a get through, when the soul is weeping the most, eh? well whatever, Thanks.
i get the feeling that im going to complete my wishlist sooner than i thought. of all the things i want..it's more of a need actually, only two remain. i guess i can pen down new ones coz the remaining 2 aren't easy to get. i played online games before, and these remaining 2 are like the super uber rare things to get huhu but it will come from time to time so i know i'll get em somehow, as long as i don't get lost on the way.
im kinda feel disturbed by my surrounding. there was a guy just now, came to steal mangoes. he was caught red handed. i went to check it out coz there was a loud quarrel and found myself in an idiotic scene. this guy, even when caught red handed, he STILL plucking the fruits off the branches and that got my uncle a bit angry. he was threaten for the police and this guy with no shame telling us that his son is a policeman and has no obligation not to steal the mangoes. i was like .. wtf. why did he need to ruin my Sunday like that. why can't people just play smart and stop this act of stupidity.
sleepy now.. if dreamland wont accept me this time, i'ma knock down the door forcefully gahaha.
it's good to experience to good life sometimes. i bought myself a watch today. i've been wanting to buy one recently, i lost the last one by gaining some fats here and there. yup, getting blotted by the days, i say. it feels nice though, well yeah, i cant afford to pamper myself with cool stuff every now and then. i ain't no rich guy from the block but miracles do happen, eh? i guess HE always pick up dates and channeling em miracles during harsh days just to make it in time for a get through, when the soul is weeping the most, eh? well whatever, Thanks.
i get the feeling that im going to complete my wishlist sooner than i thought. of all the things i want..it's more of a need actually, only two remain. i guess i can pen down new ones coz the remaining 2 aren't easy to get. i played online games before, and these remaining 2 are like the super uber rare things to get huhu but it will come from time to time so i know i'll get em somehow, as long as i don't get lost on the way.
im kinda feel disturbed by my surrounding. there was a guy just now, came to steal mangoes. he was caught red handed. i went to check it out coz there was a loud quarrel and found myself in an idiotic scene. this guy, even when caught red handed, he STILL plucking the fruits off the branches and that got my uncle a bit angry. he was threaten for the police and this guy with no shame telling us that his son is a policeman and has no obligation not to steal the mangoes. i was like .. wtf. why did he need to ruin my Sunday like that. why can't people just play smart and stop this act of stupidity.
sleepy now.. if dreamland wont accept me this time, i'ma knock down the door forcefully gahaha.
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